Episode Transcript
[00:00:02] Speaker A: Welcome to Insightful Questions, Eastside Prep's monthly podcast. In our third season, we will feature conversations with members of the EPS community, all centered around this year's theme, Responsible Action Care Through Clarity. I'm your host, Sam Uzwak.
In this episode we're exploring Partnering with Purpose, Parents, Responsibility and School Life, a conversation about how families and schools work together to support student growth and well being. Our guests are three parents who have been deeply engaged in the EPS community through parent led events, activities and communication efforts.
Together, we'll talk about the evolving role of parents and guardians, the power of shared responsibility and how purposeful partnership helps shape a stronger, more connected school experience for everyone involved.
Joining us today is Polina Mokshina, a parent who's been part of the EPs community since 2017.
With one student currently in 10th grade and another who graduated in 2024, she brings deep experience and connection to school life.
She serves as the 10th grade class representative, class rep coordinator and a group facilitator for the Accompanied for Caregivers program.
Outside of eps, she enjoys hiking, playing board games and improvising on the piano. Hi Polina.
[00:01:39] Speaker B: Hi Sam.
[00:01:39] Speaker A: Thank you for being here.
[00:01:41] Speaker B: Happy to be here.
[00:01:43] Speaker A: Next we have Hao Song, who became part of the eps community in 2024 and has a sixth grade student. He's a grade level rep for the class of 2032 and is known for creating fun, inclusive opportunities for families to connect like student parent basketball games and early community potlucks. A passionate traveler, he's explored five continents with his family and still has a long bucket list ahead. Thanks, Hao.
[00:02:11] Speaker C: Hi Sam. I'm happy to be here.
[00:02:13] Speaker A: Finally we have Bengou Bastancy, who is the current president of Eastside Prep's association of Parents and Guardians. She has been part of the EPs community since 2019 with a daughter currently in 11th grade. She's contributed her time as a class representative, hospitality committee member and parent ambassador. Outside of eps, she serves as head of school at the American Turkish Academy of Washington and has led multiple community building efforts to support Turkish American families. She's passionate about cultural connection, education and traveling with her family. Thanks, Ben Gu.
[00:02:51] Speaker D: Hello. Happy to be here.
[00:02:53] Speaker A: Wonderful to see you. What's one word or phrase that you'd use to describe being an EPS parent right now and why that word?
[00:03:02] Speaker B: My word is supported.
I feel really supported here at eps. I think that there is a strong sense of partnership through clear communication through various events for parents, through the accessibility of teachers and staff. EPS understands one important thing supporting parents is actually one of the best ways to support the kids. When parents feel resourced, capable and competent, we are much better at parenting.
[00:03:33] Speaker C: My word is intentional. Kids in middle school are at the critical age where they are trying to find out who they are. Our parent role is changing constantly. First of all, we want to give them the room so they can explore that. But also we don't want to be completely hands off. Actually making sure that keeping that balanced and intentional approach, working with the kids I think is critical for this time.
[00:03:56] Speaker D: It feels grounding to be an EPS parent right now. There's so much happening in our kids lives, academically, socially, emotionally. But our school has its way of pulling us back to what actually matters. The communication, the values and the focus on growth over perfection. Focusing on these human aspects helped me stay centered as a parent, which is a huge relief.
I feel like I can take a breath and keep perspective and show up for my child without getting swept or getting lost in the noise.
[00:04:26] Speaker A: It's really heartwarming to hear your perspective as the head of school and as a fellow parent. Parenting is a tough gig. At times it is the most rewarding thing I'll do and at times it's the most challenging thing I do when I'm trying to think about what's best for my kids. To know that there's a support, that there's a community behind me just makes all the difference. You just mentioned the middle school years. Sometimes the middle school chapter is described as a lot.
[00:04:50] Speaker C: Absolutely.
[00:04:51] Speaker A: What kind of communication from the school has helped you best support your student through this stage?
[00:04:56] Speaker C: First of all, I think the weekly EPS news has definitely been very helpful. Thank you, Vicky.
[00:05:02] Speaker A: You just made Vicki Baldwin's year.
[00:05:05] Speaker C: Yeah. Because it's a one stop shop for everything. As a busy parent, you know, having to work 9 to 5 if there's one email we want to read, that is the beyond that fifth and sixth parent series. September, October time frame. What does kid think during that time? That's actually super helpful. The second thing I can think of is last year there was AI listening session Sam Yu actually hosted inviting all parents talk about their experience. How do we, you know, prepare our kids to deal with AI? We want them to be able to use it, but in the right way. I think the school actually does a perfect job in supporting us in that way.
[00:05:39] Speaker A: Polina, as your student has moved from the middle school into the upper school, how has your approach to parenting shifted and where does clear communication from the school still play a key role?
[00:05:50] Speaker B: There's definitely been a Shift toward more independence. Our son is managing his work clear. Communication from school still plays an important role. My favorite example is back to school night. It's so thoughtfully designed. Parents follow their kids schedules, they get to meet their teachers, they learn about expectations, the grading system, curriculum. That evening provides a sense of clarity. At the beginning of the year, I walk away knowing exactly what my son will be learning, how he will be supported in classroom and how we as parents can support him at home too.
[00:06:29] Speaker A: And it's fun.
[00:06:29] Speaker C: Yes, I love it.
[00:06:31] Speaker A: Bengoo, from your perspective, what's one way parent guardian partnerships help build a more caring and connected school culture across all the grade levels.
[00:06:42] Speaker D: The only way I can think of is the community events families help bring to life. Cultural celebration, service projects that school do, and especially old school gatherings where students see adults like parents and the staff and the teachers come together and work together, collaborating across all the grades. When they see that, they're like okay, I'm in a community that like everyone works in harmony so that that gives them a safer feeling. They feel more belonging, creates a visible, consistent presence that signals to the student that they are supported by the whole community. Not only their parents, not only teachers, but everyone comes together so they feel more supported. I think these community events are such helpful that way. So that's why we have this old school barbecue. We will be celebrating the second one this year for summer. Such a beautiful environment to stay connected and come together.
[00:07:31] Speaker A: Polina and Hau can you think of a time when the school's clarity helped you respond calmly or confidently to something your child was navigating?
[00:07:40] Speaker B: For me, it's definitely around the college conversation.
My son is in 10th grade. That's the time when college talk can become really intense. It can be stressful both for students and parents. That's exactly where school's clarity helps me stay calm.
A couple of weeks ago, parents in our grade had our first college counseling meeting. I was reminded that EPS has a great experience college counseling team that helped hundreds of students navigate this process.
We are not expected to figure this out on our own alone.
And more than just the logistics of it actually helped me shift my mindset, come back to what's important for our family, who our son is, what kind of environment will help him grow, what success really means for him.
So I think if I stay grounded in that clarity and mindset, that will make the whole process more manageable and
[00:08:43] Speaker A: probably enjoyable because it should be enjoyable. It's so exciting. But there's so much noise out there, so much pressure even Just in casual conversation. To know that there's a team who sort of holds that experience so it can be exciting is super important from my perspective.
[00:08:58] Speaker C: I'm going to use the example actually just come from yesterday. We all know there is a student protest about the recent political event that happened around the nation. I think one thing I really appreciate the school does was to actually send out an email and basically confirming that the school's role in this particular aspect from parents. We also respect our kids to freedom of speech, navigating this very complex world in their own way. From our parents perspective, we care about safety first. We want to make sure our kids are safe and sound but also in a safe way. And we appreciate that clarity.
[00:09:30] Speaker A: To me that's my job. Number one, when you have student safety, all the other excitement, all the deep exploration, all the creativity can happen. But that's the baseline. So Bengoo, you see the parent guardian community from a wider lens. What are some ways you've seen families and school employees work well together to support students and one another?
[00:09:53] Speaker D: As I often volunteering, I come together with the parents all the time and I have a chance to listen to them their feedback on firsthand. A lot of events actually that appreciated by the parents. Parent coffee meetings for example. It's an open dialogue for upper school and you create a space for them to open conversation. You give them that chance. Student led conferences, that's a great partnership. Actually they see that we are working together with parents and teachers. You are centering the students voice in that, you know just they are sharing, they are leading that conversation. Our welcoming staff, they can be a part of this too. So you work well together, right? You are giving them the opportunity. There is art, performances, sports events. The partnership is so great and you know, division wide gatherings. These moments bring families and employees side by side and celebrating students and make the sense of one community stronger.
[00:10:47] Speaker A: I'm personally excited about this. Next question.
Senior at home, seventh grader at home. Both of them over the years go from telling me about their day and exacting, perhaps exhaustive detail to silence.
Working with my 18 year old, her college process, trying to remember to listen to those college counselors. How do conversations about accountability or values happen in your household? Are they planned sit down talks? Are they car ride chats? Are they kitchen counter moments? What's worked for you?
[00:11:24] Speaker C: I would say all of the above. We have different ways to handle different situations. Car ride chats, my son going to the car. The first thing is how is it going in school? That can naturally bring Some topics that you will share, we as parents can basically help them. Oh, what do you plan to do about it? But then we as a family also have a tradition called out of View Saturday.
So every Saturday night we'll sit together, we have dinner, but then we have a roundtable basically talking about. We have some prompts like say I feel happy because X I feel sad because why I could have done better for this particular thing. So that kind of structured prompts help them actually to share a little bit more. And the reason why we want to have that at the early age is because adolescents age, they naturally don't want to share as much. But building this at an early age, this forum for them to share, they know this is routine, they want to do it every week.
[00:12:18] Speaker B: We do have those kitchen counter moments or dinner time moments when real conversations happen naturally. A thing we've figured out is to connect through our son's interest. Starting conversation with a topic that excites him actually works much better than simply asking, how was school?
Both my husband and I, we always believe that kids do better in predicted environment when they know what to expect.
So we try to be very transparent and very clear about the expectations and boundaries in our family.
And we try to maintain consistency because when rules change, often it's not going to work well.
And we also believe in leading by example.
And the same goes for accountability, respect, kindness and the way we treat each other and speak to each other.
[00:13:11] Speaker D: It is always car ride where everything is fresh right out of the school. I'm lucky in that regard that she likes sharing. As soon as she gets into the car, she starts talking where everything is fresh and I listen. Also I agree with Paulina shared interests. She loves cooking and baking. So while we are doing that, it's a great time to talk about stuff so that she shares. And of course the exciting thing comes first, right? They just share something happy happened at school. As soon as. Sometimes she even messages me too, you know, from the school, I'm like, oh, okay, that's good, that's good that you're feeling good. Car rides and like shared interests. Talking is the best being cued into
[00:13:50] Speaker A: when your kid is willing to open up. Just let it flow naturally, right? So here's our closing question and this is a chance for you to impart some hard earned wisdom on future members of our community. If you were welcoming a new EPS family tomorrow, what's one piece of advice you'd offer about engaging with the school in a way that's both clear and and caring?
[00:14:13] Speaker B: Show up as much as you can.
EPS provides so many opportunities for parents to connect. Things like back to school picnic, grade level socials, fall harvest, just to name a few.
And going to those events gives you the feel for the community.
Once you start recognizing faces and having small conversations, you feel connected. Communicating with school becomes easier and more natural.
[00:14:40] Speaker C: Assume good intent, speak early. Treat communication as collaboration, not escalation, and treat it as a collaboration. Right? I think that's the, that's the best advice I can give.
[00:14:52] Speaker D: Just ask questions. EPS is where you will be supported, you will be helped, you will be helped and you will be supported right away. The school truly responds well when families show up. Also as partners. Don't be afraid to also pace yourself. Right? I mean, you don't have to know everything. This school is the perfect place.
[00:15:08] Speaker A: Thanks for all the wisdom today.
[00:15:09] Speaker D: Thank you.
[00:15:10] Speaker C: Absolutely.
[00:15:10] Speaker A: Thank you to our guests for sharing their insights and experiences and for the many ways they help build connections and community at eps.
As we continue to grow together. It's these thoughtful partnerships between families in the school that help create a strong foundation for our students.
Thanks for listening and we'll see you next time on Insightful Questions.
For more insights, be sure to check out the EPS Weekly News every Friday.
